Edgar A. Poe, the great American poet, author, and newspaper editor announced his run for Presidency today from what was his grave in Baltimore.
Alarmed at the plunging literacy scores of school children across the country, and the diving readership by adults of novels, anthologies, magazines and newspapers, the Father of Horror and Detective fiction erupted from his resting place as fiery and angry as he was at the height of his career as a critic.
"This is terrible! A dire situation that must be reversed before it's too late! Reading is essential for a functioning healthy Republic!", proclaimed the poet. When pressed for details, Poe bellowed,"When elected President, I will make America read again!"
Edgar A. Poe wasted no time in organizing his fund-raising operation. He enlisted his aunt, Maria Clemm, to make "Poe For President" t-shirts, hats and other apparel. Said Mrs. Clemm, "The Goth kids are going to love the black and white designs. I myself love this little red, white and blue number."
Jessica Sack Nelson, a long-time Poe fan and supporter of Baltimore's Poe House and Museum, was startled but overjoyed by Poe returning. An avid reader, Nelson was just visiting Poe's grave when he suddenly appeared and launched into his dramatic stump speech. Said Nelson, "If anyone can get America reading again, it's Eddie! He has my vote for sure!"
HOW YOU CAN SUPPORT POE FOR PRESIDENT
Purchase any of the great items HERE
There are t-shirts, hoodies, mugs, hats and much much more! Click on the different categories and explore all of the great, high-quality apparel and gift items that are available!
BACK YOUR CANDIDATE, POE! MAKE AMERICA READ AGAIN!
Help get the message out to MAKE AMERICA READ AGAIN! Buy a t-shirt, hat, bag or mug and let America know where you stand!
Poe concluded his surprise stump speech by saying,"--and after we make America read again, I'll make certain that every citizen has a raven on every bust!"
This story is developing and on-going. We will update developments as they occur.